"Oh geez, Rick! What do you mean I'm looking for a new home?"
*burp* You heard right. Morty is on the search for his forever home. Just because nobody exists on purpose, doesn't mean you can't enjoy your days with your very own anxious side-kick. You don't need a Meeseeks box to make all your dreams come true anymore—we have exactly what you're looking for. And just because Morty is a little nervous, doesn't mean he's any less willing to go on inter-dimensional adventures with you. Nervous that adopting a dog may have downfalls? Never fear! We promise that Morty won't be like Snuffles (ah geez, we mean Snowball) and build a robotic suit to try to take over the world. Our Morty here wants nothing more than to find his forever Rick and cling to his side no matter what. And despite what Rick thinks, love exists and is waiting for you with your very own Morty, you know what we mean?
Now go on and fill out an adoption questionnaire and well have a Mr. Meeseeks review it right away!